MOMMY'S PEARLS

When all the others were away at Mass
I was all hers as we peeled potatoes.
They broke the silence, let fall one by one
Like solder weeping off the soldering iron:
Cold comforts set between us, things to share
Gleaming in a bucket of clean water.
And again let fall. Little pleasant splashes
From each other's work would bring us to our senses.

So while the parish priest at her bedside
Went hammer and tongs at prayers for the dying
And some were responding and some crying
I remembered her head bent towards my head,
Her breath in mine, our fluent dipping knives --
Never closer the whole rest of our lives.

from "Clearances" 

Seamus Heaney 

circa 1961

I had two mothers...  

 

...Heaney has evoked the one with his powerful image of his mother and himself in the kitchen peeling potatoes for the evening meal.  "I was all hers..." My memories of cooking with mommy are also just of the two of us, though surely the rest of you must all have been around somewhere.  The bonds of love formed, not so much with words, but with food.  A sharing not so much of thoughts but of enticing smells and sounds of cooking...tomato sauce bubbling on the stove, meatballs sizzling in the pan... the heavenly aromas mingling with the steamy chocolate pudding slowly thickening on the back of the wooden cooking spoon.  "Here, Jeanne" she says as she hands me the spoon. "Keep stirring this while I get the salad ready."  She delighted in the anticipation of a home cooked meal as much as anyone.  As to how she maintained her enthusiasm for the effort over all those years...? ...well... One thing I do know is that now, when I cook in my own kitchen, I "feel her breath in mine..."

circa 1960

My other mother began to surface in the summer of 1986.  The cooking done, the children reared, the apron strings cut, oceans crossed, a mother transformed herself. Hungry to share her new life and fresh insights with a daughter who had once shunned her as a friend, she began to write.  If one of mommy's greatest gifts to me was her joy of cooking, the other was the joy of freedom, of self discovery, of power to fashion an identity true to herself, that emerged post '86. When I revisited her letters for this blog, I appreciated, even more than before, that the journey on which she embarked is a profound legacy for all of us... Here are some of her pearls...

August 1986

on life in NYC..."I count my blessings, which are many, every day."

December 1987

on getting sober and giving up trying to control her children..."I wish I knew then, what I know now. My life would have been a lot easier." 

November 1988

on her new found independence..."Now, for me, life is so unpredictable and exciting it frightens me."

December 1988

on looking back..."It is very difficult to put into words exactly how I feel today.  It is all still very confusing to me but I do know that I don't want to go back to where I was two years ago.  Once we can accept where we are today, our lives become much more manageable and sweet."

December 1988

on disagreements..."We have to be able to discuss our differences with one another and not be afraid of confrontations."

February 1989

on communicating better with her children..."It is important to me to be able to give and take with all of my children today and to be able to recognise their humanness and tenderness." ..."I am able to day to look at life and accept it for what it is.  I'm not saying it's easy, but the results are so rewarding."

June 1989

on reaching out..."I'm never alone anymore.  It's great!"

January 1990

on trying (and failing) ..."Try to use your experiences as a learning process with the thought that someday you may be able to help someone else who is struggling with the sense of loss and incompleteness that you feel now...and remember, your feelings are all important, but they are not facts and as such you can face them squarely and then let them go....I know you will come through this trying time in your life a wonderful, loving and understanding person."

October 1990

on personal growth..."I'm happier than I've been in a long time.  Nothing has changed around me, but I have changed."

******

Lobster Newburg

From 

Joy of Cooking

This was a great favorite, served at dinner parties for the grown-ups when we lived in Somers.  It was often served with one of Dad's Pyromaniac Cookbook recipes like crepes or cherries jubilee.  Cooking it, smelling and tasting it was truly a blast from the past...so evocative of the wild dancing parties of their youth! It's super simple to prepare!

Here's the Newburg Sauce recipe from the Joy of Cooking.  I didn't bother with the lobster butter.  I bought uncooked shrimp and cooked it up in butter, then added the liquid to the sauce to get the shellfish flavor. It worked out fine like that.

Makes:1 cup

Ingredients

1/2 cup (125 ml) lobster or shrimp butter*
1 tsp (5 ml) shallots, finely chopped
1/4 cup (60 ml) sherry or Madeira
1 cup (225 ml) cream
3 egg yolks
1 tbsp (15 ml) tomato paste (optional)
1 tbsp (15 ml) cognac or brandy (optional)

Lobster or Shrimp Butter:
shells from 1 lb (.5 kg). or shrimp or 1 large lobster
1/2 cup (125 ml) butter
2 tbsp (30 ml) water
ice water

Preparation

Lobster or Shrimp Butter:
Dry shells in a low oven for a short time.
Pound them om a morter or put them through a food grinder, so they are broken up as finely as possible.
Melt butter in double boiler over hot water.
Add shells and 2 tbsp (30 ml) water.
Simmer for 10 minutes-do not boil.
Line a sieve with cheesecloth and strain the hot butter into a bowl of ice water.
Refrigerate and skim off the butter when it hardens.

Newburg Sauce:
Melt lobster or shrimp butter in a double boiler.
Add shallots and cook until translucent.
Add sherry or Madeira and cook about 3 minutes.
Beat egg yolks into cream.
Add the two mixtures stirring constantly until the sauce thickens.
If you want add tomato paste and possibly brandy or cognac.
Use at once

Once the sauce is made, throw in the cooked lobster or shrimp and  serve over rice.   

Andrew's expertly executed photo shoot of the final result

This should be an interested series of postings. A time span of 15 years exists between the birth of the oldest child - me and our youngest brother Andy. The span of years and the different types of cooking during those years tells much about our family history. I especially loved the 60's when our dad would come home from work with tales of the delicious meals he had for lunch and how he then tried to get Mom to make the recipe. This was also the time when Julia Childs was starting the French Revolution in American kitchens. We all learned quite a few new words when Dad tried to make his "crepes suzette". Although he was eventually successful, we also found out that a crepe pan can be tossed across a room without seriously hurting the pan. Thankfully - none of the kids were in the way.


One of my favorite meals was the breaded chicken cutlet. Not fancy, but I could eat the leftovers (were there ever any leftovers???) and still do for breakfast - cold from the refrig.

Such a simple and quick meal - it is still one of my favorites. I usually serve it with a crispy red skinned  potato and roasted cauliflower.

Here is a version.

Enjoy!!!

CRISP BREADED CHICKEN CUTLETS

INGREDIENTS

Chicken Parmesan Cutlets

4 chicken breast cutlets

1 cup flour
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper

3 cups Panko bread crumbs
1 cup Parmesan cheese - you can add more if you like a more cheesy taste
1 tbsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper

2 eggs
2 tbsp water

butter and olive oil - enough to sauté the cutlets

Pound out the chicken breasts so that they are 1/2 inch thick. Salt and pepper both sides. 

In a shallow dish, mix flour, salt, pepper. 

In another shallow dish, mix bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese, oregano, salt and pepper. 

In another shallow dish whisk the eggs with the water.

Heat butter and olive oil in a pan until hot . Dip the chicken cutlets into the flour, then the egg mixture, then into the bread crumbs...pressing to make the crumbs stick to the chicken. Saute for several minutes on each side. When golden brown and crisp, remove from pan onto a paper towel lined baking dish. Keep hot in a 200 degree oven until all chicken is cooked. Do not crowd the chicken in the pan and wipe out the pan after each batch of cutlets. BE sure chicken is cooked thoroughly unless you are going to use it in another recipe.

You can now serve it or continue on to make chicken parmesan.  If you are going to continue - here is the rest.

Increase oven temp to 425. When chicken is cooked, put into a greased baking dish and spoon marinara sauce over the cutlets. Top with mozzarella cheese. Put back into oven and bake 5-10 minutes, until cheese is melted and browned. Serve with spaghetti and marinara sauce on the side.

Our Latest Challenge

OK - I know that you are all cooking. It's time to blog about it again. Mary C had her first experience making real - yes... from scratch... ravioli pasta. Hopefully Greg took some pictures. Maybe we can convince her to describe her efforts and post the recipe.

Here is my latest challenge - One of the reasons we all love to cook delicious meals for our families is because our Mom set the bar for us early on.... I mean the "cooking bar".  She was into the whole 60's dinner party scene and with Dad's encouragement tried lots of new things. Cherries Jubilee anyone???? I think Dad almost burned the house down with that one.

Anyway - lets choose a memorable dish, or just one of your favorites and post the recipe and your pictures here. It doesn't have to be a full meal. It could be an appetizer, dessert, side dish or whatever you choose. It can also be your modern or adapted version of the dish.

Lets post it sometime before March 10th in memory of our beautiful mother.

BTW - If the brothers or in-laws want to contribute here - we would love it. I know that cooking in this family is not just a "sister" thing.